Met up with Dr Jackhammer again, just to see if what I have always said was true - that bad sex is really a deal breaker. And there we were sitting, talking - mostly him talking about his work and how he loves it, blah blah blah. And as he jack hammered away at me, I just knew that this was the end.
I have always believed that human contact, no matter how rubbish and horrible it is, is good. But here I was, fighting back tears. I was not sure why I was feeling that way, but there I was naked with a man kissing my neck, smelling his cologne all over my body and I just wanted to get into the feotal position and rock myself to sleep. And today, it hit me why I felt that way.
I wanted my ex back. Dr Jackhammer reminded me of what I had with him, and the question was why it ended. And I remember him saying to me after one of our many break-ups "promiscuity ruined us". The anger overtook me as I reached for the bottle of wine, what he did to me was not promiscuity, he fucked someone else and then another.
I took him back again and again and in the midst also practiced some promiscuity on my account. And after every promiscuios act, we would call each other and proffess undying love for each other. And tonight, this cold June night, I was going to call him and say I miss him. I like my pills and he, my favourite drug, my Mr Wrong who knows how to touch me so right. Superman had kryptonite, I have Mr Wrong.
So my wine drenched heart asks me this tonight: is it possible to have amazing spine tingling, sweat on brow sex with someone who ticks the right boxes? A mature man who knows where he is going in his life and says and does the right things or is that guy going to jackhammer for 10 minutes because some girl who has had sex with two people told him it was the way to go? Or in the quest for good sex, do we have to settle for a Mr Wrong who calls his unfaithfulness promiscuity?
I think most of the time, mr wrong will come out 1st in the sheets department. We just need to decide if we will settle for a good man with average sex or settle for an asshole with mind blowing sex...
ReplyDeleteI went to see my Gynae a couple of weeks ago he said to me: Generations of women before you married and settled to be with men who had sex for their own pleasure and not to give their women pleasure. These women probably never even knew what orgasm was but they were content with staying at home, raising the kids, keeping the household together and pleasuring their men when required to.
ReplyDeleteYou are a generation of women who demand sexual pleasure from their men, and they also have to look good, and provide, and speak well, and be well read and and and. Is it realistic is the questions I often ask myself. To expect so much out of one human being. And if not, what do you strike off your list of priorities then?
Unfortunately that's the sad reality of ur journey to finding husbands but at some point we need to find a balance.
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